Perhaps you’ve been on the dating journey for a while and you’re thinking, “What has dating ever done for me?” Don’t give up just yet! You may not have found ‘the one’ so far, but did you know that there are many skills you can develop during the dating process? You may not have thought about it like that, but even if your journey hasn’t connected you with the perfect person just yet, you are developing life skills that will benefit you, both inside and outside of the dating world.
Here are just a few of important life skills you’re developing as you date.
Enhanced listening and communication skills
If you want to get to know people, you have to talk to them (who would’ve thought?) It follows that the more people you meet whilst dating, the better your listening skills become. Making small talk can be difficult to start with, but gradually, this leads to proper conversations and that’s how you get to know someone. So, stick at it!
Planning and organising
Dating can help your organisational skills, believe it or not! You might have a very busy schedule but if you’re serious about meeting new people, or to put it more directly, meeting that special person, you will make time for it in your diary. It might mean moving things around, arranging cover and childcare if you’re a parent, or even cancelling one or two not-so-important appointments, but you will need to find a suitable slot in your calendar to make time for your dates. Getting ready for those dates and even thinking about what to do on them will also require some planning and time management skills.
Creativity
Speaking of date ideas, dating helps the creative juices to flow. Unless you want to do the same activity repeatedly, dating allows you to think up new and fun ways to hang out. From picnics to walks to visiting galleries to going to the cinema, date ideas are numerous and you can even think up something a bit more unusual but surprisingly fun! And, if you need a bit of help, you can use your research skills too! The Christian Connection blog has lots of date ideas to explore.
Discernment
The fairytales tell us that to meet your prince you might have to kiss a few frogs. I’m not sure about that, but I do know that the more people you date, the more you get to know what you like and what you don’t. And the easier it is for you to just know when something isn’t going to work, or someone just isn’t for you. It could be the way they respond to a question you ask, something they’ve done, or even just an offhand comment made. The experience of dating can improve your discernment skills if you let it.
Social skills
Dating helps improve your social skills. First, the fact that you’re dating means that you’re getting to meet new people. This involves communicating with them and getting to know them, doing activities together, getting to know their likes and dislikes, and generally just being around each other.
Your social skills also improve as you get to meet the people that are important to the person you’re dating. These might be family members or close friends, people from different walks of life; they may be older or younger than you, with completely different interests, but the fact that they are important to the person you’re dating means that you also apply your social skills to get to know them.
Self-awareness
Dating helps you to become more self-aware. By the time you’ve dated a couple of people you get a clearer idea of what you like and don’t like, the negotiables and non-negotiables, but also, how you come across to people. This is important because knowing what you like and don’t like can save both yourself and others, time. Being self-aware also means you become aware of how you come across to others. If a relationship didn’t work out with someone, taking some time to reflect can help you figure out where you might need to adjust or do things differently next time.
These are just some of the life skills that dating can help you develop, and I would argue that they are important, not just for dating but for life in general.
What life skills have you developed through dating?
Enjoyed reading ‘6 important life skills you’re secretly developing while dating’? Read more by Urenna Kiwanuka here
